This illustration was inspired by an article on what it means to be feminine or masculine, but it really comes from my own experience. Over the years I’ve experimented with my style, especially my hair, and I’ve noticed how much it affects the pronouns people use for me. My hair seems to dictate how society perceives my gender.
I shaved my head when I came out as nonbinary. Growing up in a conservative Muslim household, being a girl came with restrictions and expectations I never wanted. It felt like a punishment for something I had not done. Shaving my head felt like a way to be seen and taken seriously. For a while, people used they/them automatically, without even being introduced.
Now that my hair has grown out, I’m often referred to as she/her, even when I correct people. It can be disheartening and makes me question why identity still feels like something I have to perform. I shouldn’t have to prove my identity for it to be recognized, but sometimes it feels like that is the only way it works.
The illustration reflects that tension. I placed a shattered mirror in the top-right third to represent society, how it defines what is masculine or feminine, and how fragile those definitions can be. The hair spells out they/them, representing both shedding and a new life. Half-tone dots guide the eye while also suggesting the overwhelming gaze of society. I chose a muted grey-teal palette to reflect the androgyny I felt I owed the world in exchange for recognition of my pronouns.
Created in Adobe Illustrator.
